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1. Data: 2007-03-07 21:21:36
Temat: Ciekawostka [ang.] [niekrótkie]
Od: "Tomek P." <a...@y...pl>
Prawidłowy proces rekrutacji (tu: na stanowisko premiera) wg słynnego
Cyryla N. Parkinsona
Fragment z:
PARKINSON'S LAW
And other Studies in Administration
The first step in the process is to decide on the qualities a Prime
Minister ought to have. These need not be the same in all circumstances,
but they need to be listed and agreed upon. Let us suppose that the
qualities deemed essential are (1) Energy, (2) Courage, (3) Patriotism,
(4) Experience, (5) Popularity, and (6) Eloquence. Now, it will be
observed that all these are general qualities which all possible
applicants would believe themselves to possess. The field could readily,
of course, be narrowed by stipulating (4) Experience of lion-taming, or
(6) Eloquence in Mandarin. But that is not the way in which we want to
narrow the field. We do not want to stipulate a quality in a special form;
rather, each quality in an exceptional degree. In other words, the
successful candidate must be the most energetic, courageous, patriotic,
experienced, popular, and eloquent man in the country. Only one man can
answer to that description and his is the only application we want. The
terms of the appointment must thus be phrased so as to exclude everyone
else. We should therefore word the advertisement in some such way as
follows:
Wanted! Prime Minister of Ruritania. Hours of work: 4 A.M. to 11.59 P.M.
Candidates must be prepared to fight three rounds with the current
heavyweight champion (regulation gloves to be worn). Candidates will die
for their country, by painless means, on reaching the age of retirement
(65). They will have to pass an examination in parliamentary procedure and
will be liquidated should fail to obtain 95% marks. They will also be
liquidated if they fail to gain 75% votes in a popularity poll held under
the Gallup Rules. They will finally be invited to try their eloquence on a
Baptist Congress, the object being to induce those present to rock and
roll. Those who fail will be liquidated. All candidates should present
themselves at the Sporting Club (side entrance) at 11.15 A.M. on the
morning of September 19. Gloves will be provided, but they should bring
their own rubber-soles shoes, singlet, and shorts.
Observe that this advertisement saves all trouble about application forms,
testimonials, photographs, references, and short lists. If the
advertisement has been correctly worded, there will be only one applicant,
and he can take office immediatelywell, almost immediately. But what if
there is no applicant? That is proof that the advertisement needs
rewording. We have evidently asked for something more than exists. So the
same advertisement (which is, after all, quite economical in space) can be
inserted again with some slight adjustment. The pass mark in the
examination can be reduced to 85 per cent with 65 per cent of the votes
required in the popularity poll, and only two rounds against the
heavyweight. Conditions can be successively relaxed, indeed, until an
applicant appears.
Suppose, however, that two or even three candidates present themselves. We
shall know that we have been insufficiently scientific. It may be that the
pass mark in the examination has been too abruptly lowered - it should
have been 87 per cent, perhaps, with 66 per cent in the popularity poll.
Whatever the cause, the damage has been done. Two, or possibly three,
candidates are in the waiting room. We have a choice to make and cannot
waste all the morning on it. One policy would be to start the ordeal and
eliminate the candidates who emerge with least credit. There is,
nevertheless, a quicker way. Let us assume that all three candidates have
all the qualities already defined as essential. The only thing we need do
is add one further quality and apply the simplest test of all. To do this,
we ask the nearest young lady (receptionist or stenographer, as the case
may be), "Which would you prefer?" She will promptly point out one of the
candidates and so finish the matter. It has been objected that this
procedure is the same thing as tossing a coin or otherwise letting chance
decide. There is, in fact, no element of chance. It is merely the
last-minute insistence on one other quality, one not so far taken into
account: the quality of sex appeal.
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"Nie ma prawdziwego socjalizmu bez demokracji. Podobnie jak nie ma
prawdziwej demokracji bez socjalizmu."
Róża Luksemburg